It's almost four years since the last time I put anything on this audience-less corner of the internet. It's 5.28 am in the morning, I didn't sleep all night because my sleep cycle has somehow inverted at the beginning of the week. The sky has turned blue and I can spy from the windows in my room a cargo ship docked across the channel at one of the ports near Shinagawa.
I have been hit with a pang, I'm not
sure if it is the correct way of using this word, of nostalgia recently.
I went through my old diaries the other day and felt a kind of
unfamiliarity with my old self. I discovered a certain hint of
excitement in my old writings that I am sure I have incredible
difficulties in reproducing now. So there were some pages in the diary
describing my activity as an organizer during some sort of a student
body election in ITB back then. I can easily decipher from the writing
how I felt for a certain candidate back then or my feelings about each
of the event within the election process. These kinds of writings, where
I can easily tell whether I had a positive or a negative experience,
have somehow disappeared from recent diaries.
Does this simply indicate me growing old? Or maybe I've had my share of talking about my feelings with people, that I lost the need to write them in minute details?
Anyhow, stumbling upon this blog again could be a sign for me to
rediscover that old feeling of excitement.
おそらく。
